21 December 2007
Another thing to enjoy...
One more fucking day at work and this year of it is OVER. Of course the same shit will still be there next year, in an all too brief 10 days time. Still 2008 is shaping up to be a cracker. And you can't have crackers without a sacrifice or two.
Have a good holiday kids, all 0 of you reading this (; and lets see if we can't swing the numbers in 2008!
Ha! - The Mathematical Proof!
Don't treat them otherwise, just fucking enjoy them!
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16 December 2007
A Bi-Monthly Rhythm
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I think it may have something to do with Google Reader which has organised my web based readings away from sidonia.net (where I used to link to all my favorite blogs etc.). Means I don't visit this space often and can aviod the 'guilt' of not utilising it.
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Many things on the boil at the moment.
Work is going OK. Embroiled in a project which is equal measure frustration, stress and satisfyingly busy.
As per last post (now a further two months along) Sal is pregnant. This is by far an away the most exciting thing that has ever happened in my life (that I have chosen to do). Six months is a long time to be excited, but it remains, changes and progresses and I have no doubt it will continue to build till the end of March when the little babe pops out into the world and says hello! Can't wait.
I expect with the plans afoot regarding the birth and thereafter, that I will begin to use this space more often as an area for my musings (unless I'm inundated with nappies and lack-o-sleep etc.). Till then I expect that I'll continue to ignore its existence.
For Xmas I am off to Morocco (again) to go riding in the Atlas Mountains. How cool is that? I say VERY COOL. Will try to feel obligated to let you know how that goes.
A father's perspective of pregnancy is changed irreversibly when he feels the baby kicking for the first time. Try it sometime!
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Sal is in Perth (Australia) this week! Then in Nelson (NZ) for a week and a bit to celebrate Xmas with her folks. The potential grandparents (mine included) are convening in Nelson to 'inspect' the bump. I'm very happy about this, but sad not be there to take part in this family event.
At times I have felt very selfish and irresponsible coming to the decision to have kids. I did it without consulting my side of the family, and once the pregnancy became a reality, I found the idea of telling my family difficult. I was projecting my own insecurities about having a child onto their response. When I did tell them, they were only positive and supportive. Of course!
To have them rally together to inspect the bump makes me even more grateful that we are having a kid. I feel a bit as if it has 'allowed' our respective folks and extended family to move on from thinking of Sal and me as not just long term boyfriend and girlfriend but as part of the family--there to stay, there to be supported. And it is very cool to think that active decisions I've/we've made have the backing of the tribe. This is basic life at its best.
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Anyway, after making rash statements like "I'm not going to drink while Sal is pregnant" I am off to prepare for a Saturday drinking session. Rest assured, I've had plenty of practice in the last 6 months...
Little one (if you read this in the years to come) as well as current readers: this Dad (to be) will often not live up to his words, but he means well and wonders if this is enough?
18 October 2007
Four Months
I had news back then but I couldn't tell you,
Now that same news is two months older,
And I don't want to keep it a secret...
Two plus two equals four,
I'm going to be a dad.
09 August 2007
The Old Story
Anyway the track is sort of a theme tune for me at the moment. Life is beautiful, but made up of an orchestra of ever-so-slightly dischordant parts. And for many resons the title of the track resonates with me; there is meaning beyond the music too. I'd explain - but I don't think I can.
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The riding is going well. I'm turning into a speed demon, last outing had me riding to work and back in two hours and eleven mins. An improvement of a whopping 49 mins of my average round-trip ride time I started off commuting to work with. However I'm following a new route, and if this new route (on road) is accurately measured by google maps then that is an-oh-so-close effort of riding >40miles at 30km/hr or above. I mix the distance units, cause it's the UK and they still deal with stupid measurement distances here, like miles...
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Work is actually busy - and providing me with an unusual 8am-5pm focus. I've even been staying late. Something is going wrong. I suspect that I'm finding stuff to occupy myself cause I'm exercising, happy with life and don't want work to be the only thing that dents my positive attitude at the moment.
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A random guy walking past my window just scared the crap out of me by loudly addressing me with things like "You have a good evening!"and "God Bless".
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That is all!
30 July 2007
10 July 2007
Systems Check
In my last post I stated that I've gone bike mad. Now the total miles is greater that 420 and I've saved at least £83.20 on transport costs. The main problem with it is that recently (i.e. 3 out of the last 4 trips) the return ride home has been weather affected which typically means that a) I arrive home angry with the lack-o-summer and b) need to launder my wet and filthy gear (clothes, self and bike). I mean for christ sake, yesterday the ride was replete with rain, thunder, lightening and hail the latter of which had fortunately fallen before I rode over it but still had the effect of near freezing the puddles and consequently my soggy arse. I really should invest in a rear pannier rack or mudguard or something to keep me more dry while riding.
Another unfortunate bilking experience was I lost a shoe! No not off my foot in a "Puff! Hey my shoe disappeared!" kind of a way, no the sneaky wee bugger wormed its way out of my bag on the ride to work last Friday. In actual fact it totally unzipped my bag and then jumped to freedom. So I had an interesting Friday walking around work with no shoes, good for encouraging pre-weekend laughter I suppose. Couldn't find the shoe on the ride home either, which is a shame cause now the path has been rained on too many times to consider picking it up even if it comes out of hiding...
Anyway, more biking related news that you probably haven't missed is the fact that the Tour de France started in London this year and yours truly went to Hyde Park to see what the fuss was all about. Got a little distracted by the weather and the cycle village to actually push my way to the circuit but did watch the lads ride around extremely quickly on the big screen they had put up for lazy people like me. Was a thoroughly enjoyable afternoon in the sunshine. Even signed up to sustrans to help cover the cost my cycling on the national bike network (most of the tow path I ride is on their network). Oh and I got interviewed by a BBC radio reporter about the Tour while sitting on the grass and playing with Sal's bike. I wonder if anyone heard it!
Enough of bikes - so will quickly finish off with what I'm reading at the moment - David Mitchell's "Black Swan Green". He is a writer that the dependable morgue introduced me to - probably back in 2000 when he gave me "Ghostwritten". I loved that novel, still do in fact, and that copy is still in a shelf somewhere at home (I am now better at sharing book love!). Since then I have read his other two novels as well, "Number9Dream" and "Cloud Atlas" the latter of which is amazing
Best quote thus far and has me pleased in the sense that the novel may have some of the fantastical elements present in David's first three novels is:
'Unborn Twin murmured, Go to the lake.'
Reading is fun kids.
28 June 2007
The News
"And the crazy lady said yes."Go Mr and Mrs Trees, King and Queen (of France), God and Goddess!
That said, I will also bore you with some of the details of my life!
Travel:
Have recently returned from a diving trip to Gozo, the
See I was diving! While I was underwater I saw some cool stuff including:
and
(Thanks Arna for the great pics)
We are of to Paris this weekend, sadly not for King Leon's marriage. Never been to Paris. Travel is cool.
Biking:
Have been biking like mad recently Purchased a bike very similar to this one (but with nasty touring front suspension), and have been thrashing it to and from work as a commuting option that a) saves me £8.20 per day if I ride both ways b) gets me fit c) gives me a reason to go to work and a) saves me £8.20! Did I mention that already?
Thus far I've ridden 240miles to work and back, saving a total of £50.40. That is about 20% of the value of the bike. I've lost about 3kgs in about three weeks and have gotten to a point where the time it takes me (approx. 1hr 30mins) is beatable. I managed a 1hr 22mins ride this morning (fastest ride between home and work so far) without really pushing hard. My next goal is to push this towards 1hr 15mins and still maintain the ability to walk and stay awake for a full work day afterwards. Energy levels seem to be recovering with a pita bread and jam before and after, and a bunch of food throughout the day! I'm eating LOTS, but it is still tons cheaper than £8.20 per day!
Made an interesting discovery that climbing shoes make good cycling shoes - light and sturdy (my current climbing shoes are too big for climbing, so this is now a good use for them). Am also too cheap to buy proper cycling shorts so my bum is feeling it.
The ride is pretty cool, 20 miles of almost-sealed 'single track' along the Lea river. I have seen three deer, lots of rabbits and almost got a pigeon as roadkill on Monday! Main problem is that the track is bumpy and has lots of puddles that a) in the recent wet weather make for a very dirty ride and b) will make the route impossible during winter. At that stage I'll have to commute along the road, which after the recent traffic free experiences I've been having, will be a hardship. Still £8.20 per day...
07 June 2007
More links
06 June 2007
Quick Update!
Stuff
Reading Margret Atwood's Oryx and Crake at the moment and enjoying it for the pessimistic attitude towards technology and the stupid industry I'm in.
Then The Moose linked me to this article saying that most research is false. I've printed that for further bathroom (my new library) reference. Read it.
A colleague at work showed me one of the news article about this, which gave me hope that what some people in the industry do is worthwhile. But then I got depressed about pills; about big pharma business eking out only a couple of months for patients from their profits...
I've mucked around with Facebook and I just have to say that it is a little bit scary no matter what Morgue says! I'm also thinking that the social networking sites like Facebook facilitate a move towards what I have already talked about somewhere (can't remember where) where not only will we tie up far too much importance on computing technology to get 'together' but it will also widen the gap between those with the technology and those without. * searches for what he thinks he wrote a long while back * Ah ha! Here it is!
Anyway pet project number one has been the whole can I get to work and back without relying on public transport. It has involved much oohing and ahhing and a hell of a lot of hand wringing about the distance - something more than 22 miles (I'm still not sure - but suspect an upper maximum would be 25 or 26 miles). Doesn't sound too bad on paper - but realise folks that that is a MARATHON!
Anyway, my lovely girlfriend has been totally supportive about me buying a bike and just trying it out, and what sage advice that has been. The bike has been great for getting around in the city. But I've been too scared, I mean I've deliberated and not tried the work ride... until now!
And I can report that it was a bloody good ride. I forgot how easy it is to chew up distance on a bike when the main enemies to momentum, namely wind and hills, aren't present. And so, door-to-door, it's an one hour and twenty five mins... That's not too bad for a traffic free ride to work especially considering the train is one hour and five mins door to door. The only pain is the time lost in having to change, which I'm gonna have to work on, cause it still feels as if I've come home and hour later than usual.
Anyway, to aid answering how long the work commute is, I've created a My Maps at google maps. I have mapped out part of the route into nifty straight line segments and then worked out a way to grab the coordinates of my markers so that I can calculate the distance between them to add up to a journey total (all this for an error improvement on 4 miles!!!). Of course I will need some math to help me work out how to get the distance from markers A to B to C etc. and from a quick foray into the interweb I suspect it is here, but crap, I just rode 22+ miles and I can't quite get my head around it yet!
That is all for now. I've just had some exercise, can you tell?
21 May 2007
25 April 2007
CIpP
The only direction I can see this moving in is the same one that balances out all the anti-social outputs of capitalism, and that is public accountability. There are three influences of note on corporations - financial incentive, legislative restriction, and public accountability. The first is far more of a problem than it is a potential solution. There are major, major limits to what can be achieved by the second. The third is the only credible way of restraining the behaviour that you oppose.I agree with most of this – clearly it is in both the company's and investor's best interests to keep maintaining the huge profit cycles that arise from the current Pharma development modes.
I also believed that the legal framework would not affect change on these giant corporations. This is exactly what I was referring to when I mentioned (a little off hand) that "these businesses have been around since forever in terms of the current legal and social frameworks we now move in."
With that I was trying to skirt was having to fully explain that these corporations have fully melded their business with the bodies governing them. Together, hand-in-hand almost, Pharma companies buddy up with the regulatory institutes to get their drugs to market, jumping through the necessary hoops and happily wearing the esculating costs.
Then, of course, they sidle up to the governments to get their, now hideously expensive, drugs into the hands of the patients. The cost model of the industry is not that of patient affordability, government subsidies are the only way that patients can be treated with all too many of the available drugs. And that changes the marketability of drugs, not only do you have to sell them to patients, you first have to ptich them to governments for susidies… It is a crazy cycle.
But I was wrong in thinking that there wouldn't be a legal trick avalable to take on Pharma CipP because, my good Wilberforce, it has already happened! This gives me heart that it can happen again under a different and hopefully even more widespread context. And what I'm referring isn't restriction—it's the opposite! I'm talking about Thailand's decision to break the patent protections afforded to some drug companies by invoking a WTO rule. I won't bother you with the details, because the point is simply: Yes, Governments and laws can help us out of this situation. I still feel a reservation about this as there is a a great deal of collusion between the governments and the big pharmas that will be very resistant to change, but the signs are good that things can change.
And the best thing about all this is that I'm not feeling as desperately hopless about it anymore. We as a drug taking society can change the industry. We can influence our governments. We have a precident that governments can influence big pharmas. It can be done, and I for one am still thinking about doing it.
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For a good overview of Thailand's take-on approach to the Pharma insutry, click through to here.
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In other sciency type news, they have found Kryptonite!
20 April 2007
Things I've seen today
It started with Fahrenheit 911, I'm watching this in dribs and drabs at the moment, and whenever I load it up I always like to hear George W. say "If I hit every shot good, people would say I wasn't working!" which doesn't mean shit, but amuses the heck out of me for some reason.
Surfing the Internet a bit later, I'm directed to The Last Great Snail Chase, which I'm totally hanging out to experience more of. It is great to see folk you know go and and achieve things they are dedicated to and I can't wait to see the final product. Bring it out on DVD asap Ed! (thanks to ~m for the linky)
The next thing was a follow up note on the communal main door to the building our flat is in. The first followed a burglary in another flat, where a drifter had gained entry to the building and had posed as a resident and subsequently been let into a flat. He then bolted with a bunch of stuff from the flat. Kind of a ballsy robbery really and goes to show that you shouldn't open your door round here to just anybody - a debate which I'd only recently. I'm all for thinking that this is a pretty safe area - delusional really. But fuck it, I'm not gonna get scared and paranoid about it just yet.
Anyway post the robbery there was a note taped to the door bemoaning the fact that the drifter had been let in to the building and had the tone of "I know what you look like..." and I'm gonna get you! Well sort of.
And - then today, off on my way to work I saw another note along the lines of:
I've no idea if it was written by the same 'victim' but I immediately assumed it was and, quite out of character, I found myself laughing my arse off at the whole situation. I don't normally go for laughing at other people's misfortune, but man that note made my day as I headed off to enjoy the UK bureaucratic process.
I've a feeling 'Ron the Body' is a little to blame, that particular four letter word is bandied about almost as often as 'the' and I need very little encouragement to turn my talk to the gutter! But it is mostly my fault, in fact I've been caught out twice recently absently saying the c word in the company of people who appeared quite shocked to have to listen to it... It's only a word right? Hmmmn. Anyway, that note's sign off did make me laugh!
And the walk to the NI office had two other notable sights. The first was one of those yellow boards outlining some unsolved crime and appealing for information. This time the robbery of a moped at 4.30pm on the 6th of April. I hate to imagine the circumstances of the robbery, those yellow boards are NEVER used when 'no one got hurt' type robberies go unsolved round here... Cue bad feelings for earlier laughing at people's misfortune, and more work to make me delusional that this area is 'safe'!
To top it off, just past the Geffrey Museum, I see an ambulance parked up and a fairly worried looking paramedic deciding which type of stretcher to use. I walk past with DJ Shadow playing in my ears and see into a steep staircase in the doorway leading to an upstairs flat, and at the bottom, another worried looking paramedic tending and to a sprawled very plainly broken male figure. I notice a worried looking man in suit talking on his cell phone with bloodied hands. A flatmate? I'm not sure, but like the most of London passing by this scene, it is none of my problem and it's apparently under control and I walk past.
And NI number, and not too much bureaucracy. Though I'm tested to sign my name like the one on my passport a signature I produced 7 years ago. Unsurprisingly, given my lack-o-handwriting, I fail and now I hope that I won't be DENIED on the NI number front.
And I walk back home with the sun shining and I go past the stairwell again. The ambulance and broken man are gone, it is now cordoned off with police tape, and there is a cop taking notes from some folk. The music is till in my ears and I'm not compelled to stop or enquire. But I can't help noticing the white blood stained sheets at the foot of the stairs and I wonder what the yellow board will say.
12 April 2007
Now I see!
I've been feeling nothing for sidonia for a long while and this has been compounded by my instantaneous negativity towards the last three posts. In fact till about a week ago I'd not checked back... And when I did there was a comment. And that made me feel better about it. And I read the comment, and then (because I couldn't remember what I'd written) I had to read the post it referred to! And (yes this is a large succession of ands...) I've got a point. I've got a fucking point!
It is this...
* breathes in long and hard *
Capitalism - works by exploiting an advantage.
Intellectual Property - is all about protecting an advantage.
Protectionism - is any method by which IP remains protected.
Profiteering - works best when you combine the above (lets call it CIpP) and then milk it for all it's worth.
For the record I believe this equation:
CIpP = Very Bad!
I work in the drug business - the legal drug business. And I can say that despite the publicity they would have you believe, large pharma companies are profiteers plain as day. Everything they do - and remember that most of these businesses have been around since forever in terms of the current legal and social frameworks we now move in - is profiteering. (I know I should back this up but I'm just going to continue).
Don't get me wrong, drug companies are probably the only places where we will actively see commercialised advances in treatments for important diseases like HIV/AIDS. Yay, warm fuzzies for retrovirals etc.; shame about the fact that these and other tools are not freely available for a highly mobile and task oriented health force to go out armed with them and eradicate the bloody disease.
But that is not how the pharma companies work. They are good, nay great, at a) creating HUGE cash flow b) spending that HUGE amount of money c) protecting what and how they do EVERYTHING to do with that money, so that the end result d) continues a)... (and so on).
What they are not good at is looking at a problem and solving it once and for all. They find remedies not solutions. Remedy, like purity, can be a BAD word.
And that is why I'm upset with what I do. I really like the technical challenges of contributing to projects that outwardly appear to do a great amount of good. I'll probably look back and think that some of my work has actively helped some people,
BUT,
and it is a big but, it will have also helped to contributed to a big pharma's continuation.
Ultimately what I do supports this company's CIpP (and you know how I feel about that!).
So my question to you, and the one I'm currently challenged with day in and day out while working here, is how do I resolve this conflict without leaving?
I mean I know there are still opportunities for drug development outside of the big pharma framework to get a drug candidate into circulation and help people - but even 'independent' candidates will face a hurdle where they MUST sell that idea to get it out into the world. And you know why? Because all the investment, the regulations and technology required to develop, make and market drugs is the pharma's best ally in remaining successful. No one else has the footing necessary to do all that except big pharmas, so you either join them, or you turn yourself into one—the ultimate sell-out! And lo and behold pharma profiteering is maintained.
There is little I feel I can do to prevent any of the big pharmas continuation - in fact I'm so disheartened about it I can't even see a theoretical approach that would even get close.
I saw 'Amazing Grace' the other day and despite the fact that I've little to say about this overly Hollywood (and outright dumb in parts) movie is that it was relevant illustrating for me how good ideas stumble against profiteering. Unfortunately I can't ever see a clever trick that could be used to peg pharma CIpP back and I also don't envision turning myself into a crusading Wilberforce type character. I could do with some laudanum though…
So what to do? Any suggestions?
23 March 2007
Engage
I was going to try and do a three x three x three thing and TRY and be all clever with it. But WHY? So instead I'm going to list some things that are really involving my brain at the moment:
IP - Intellectual Property.
Protectionism - As a way of maintaining IP.
Profiteering - as a way of milking protectionism.
I HATE:
that I work for a drug company.
that I don't feel I can make a positive difference in my work.
that IP and Protectionism and Profiteering are hand-in-hand.
I WANT:
to work for a company.
that I feel I can make a positive difference for with my work.
and that IP and Protectionism that the company I work for employs prevents profiteering on any one's part.
The last post?
All these (3) things.
I've been totally blocked from saying things on the quince since god knows how long. I feel as if there are a million and one things that I need to tell you all (all 3 of ya!). But what exactly? In which order? How? and then it all stops. The flow is dammed (in the verb sense, as in to dam a river - fuck I wonder sometimes if I'm fluent in English and it is NEVER helped by going to the Turkish barber just down the road from you and asking for a haircut).
So, revert, update. (is that a sentence? - probably not... edit...).
SO. Here is an UPDATE! (acknowledging the indiscriminate use of CAPS!).
I have a new JOB. I started at the end of last month. It is the promise of something more. But it has failed to deliver, as my suspicion led me to believe many moons ago. I do not care. For the moment. But I suffer for want of something TO DO!
This means lots of things, but primarily this: I need a distraction. Morgue has inadvertently put his hand up. Bless him. I'll take ANY distraction he giveth me.
And it also means that I'm squandering what precious little time I have on this earth by wondering and pondering and doing NOTHING about a myriad of things that I need an audience for. But I also need a muse.
And that is where I see this site failing. It isn't my muse. Where do you find a muse these days??? The technology is there - why can't I capitalise? It isn't time, but it may be my priority!
I need virtual help. Will any of you provide it?
OK
Number One: No blog activity. Apologies. Nothing to write.
Number Two: New Job. Boring. I await training...
Number Three: Happy. Life is interesting. In tune...
02 March 2007
Good on you Harry!
It doesn't help that I have an iPod shuffle that doesn't tell me the track name, and also have an incredibly poor ear for lyrics that makes the looking up of a familiar but unknown song all that more difficult.
So I've just been able to track down a recent addition to iTunes and it comes from Harry, NZ's Flash kind.
So good on you Harry. Nice one. And I don't mean that in the tabloid sense...
16 February 2007
Update
Of course to celebrate I went climbing, and Sal went to dinner with a friend for we (as a couple) care not for the commercial trappings and enforced romantic attentions of an arbitrary date. Though it was interesting to learn that this particular arbitrary date used to celebrate werewolves, blood and ****ing!
So yeah, I'm in the envious position of being able to a) resign from work (did that yesterday), b) get a start date for my new permanent job (the 26th of Feb) c) extend next weekend by a couple of days (I quit next Wednesday) and d) go to Rome!
Fucking Rome! How cool is that? I for one like them apples.
In short, life is good. Hope yours is too.
24 January 2007
NZ Visit
Now it is on to the arduous task of hanging out with everyone I know in Wellington before getting on the flight on Saturday to bring me back to my UK existence. Busy, busy, busy!